MEME: texts from last night

[high_warlock]

Texts From Last Night

Go to the site Texts From Last Night and dig into your favorite Tumblr posts. You can use these either as an example in order to make up your own texts your characters might send each other during a night out, or find applicable existing ones on the site.

Tag characters into the post with these. Other characters can respond with texts of their own. Optionally, you can place the texts on relevant screencaps or post texts for other people's characters if you find a particularly good one.

Comments

lois lane

[skepticgirl_1]

1. Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell Burger Pit.

2. Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.

3. so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.

4. Text her.

magnus lightwood-bane

[high_warlock]

1. You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border

2. The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...

3. Text him.

2

[every_blossom_blooming]

IF YOU WANNA BE MY LOVER

Vasquez

[quinientos]

1. Tequila. Because sometimes it's fun for your hands to go numb

2. Oh god, I need an adult. Wait. Shit. I am an adult.

3. I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where should I start, the gay sex or the rampant alcoholism?

4. Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail

[bye_felicia]

You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.

peggy carter

[womanofvalue]

1. FYI, at my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically on my casket

2. Just calling to thank you for not dying.

3. That's what jaegar bombs out of teacups will do to you

4. I've never been so embarrassed for you and proud of my tits

rowan damisch

[scythe_lucifer]

1. Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?

2. One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.

3. Text him.

1

[du_vallon]

and the other five percent?

Porthos du Vallon

[du_vallon]

1. One might say we're banned from that church.

2. Yeah, you're right. It's a conspiracy against you. This small, tight-knit group of people who don't like assholes.

3. He wears a hat, all the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.

4. Text him!

1

[god_of_the_arena]

that priest was having fun whatever he regrets now

victra au julii

[bye_felicia]

1. He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke

2. kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party

3. Text her.

Re: victra au julii

[scion_of_ancients]

2. You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom

Wanda Maximoff

[nothingmorehorrifying]

Re: Wanda Maximoff

[notaskingpermission]

On a toatally unrelated note, I see magic in my hair

Billy Russo

[to_do_and_die]

1. I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...

2. You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.

3. i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

4. Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more

5. how does that bad decision feel?

6. text him

Re: Billy Russo

[notaskingpermission]

(re: #2)

They should have hired you for doing their job.

Gannicus

[god_of_the_arena]

1. My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.

2. It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.

3. This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?

4. o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket

5. text him!

the Iron Bull

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

1. I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.

2. he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'

3. I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner

4. I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you

5. I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.

6. text him!

Rosie Wilson

[forthsofar]

1. my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now

2. Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me

3. text her!

Daine Sarrasri

[wildmage_daine]

1. he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.

2. That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.

3. how does that bad decision feel?

4. When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.

5. text her

[andhiswife]

1. School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. It’s a sign

2. Help I accidentally unlocked this guy’s tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!

3. You’re incredible, and I’m drunk

4. I would never blame a unicorn for anything… how dare you

5. text her

[very_sharpe]

I think you're incredible, too.

Nina Zenik

[every_blossom_blooming]

1. Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.

2. I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti

3. im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal

4. proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.

5. How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?

6. text her!

Verity

[notaskingpermission]

1. I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome

2. I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.

3. It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.

4. This house was built for laser tag.

5. haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"

[behindmothersback]

religion really DOESN'T MAKE SENSE

Party Poison

[afabulouskilljoy]

1. Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on

2. We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"

3. Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...

4. text him!

Doctor Strange

[whatpossibilities]

1. it's hard to say how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain

2. I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.

3. there's a pinata and candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.

4. Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.

5. it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.

6. TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT

[flightfromennui]

1. I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder.

2. my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now.

3. You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational and incoherent.

4. If you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I'll give you head.

5. text him!

[patriotqueen]

Note to self: drink the gin before getting home, chuck away the tonic.

(The mun meanwhile is just giggling at the image of drunk Anthony texting)

[handfulofsapphires]

1. Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table.

2. everyone around me are such idiots I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.

3. You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch

4. This can only be settled by a dance off.

5. moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone

Matthias Helvar

[someones_monster]

1. tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry

2. STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!

3. All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.

4. How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?

5. Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.

Baz

[sidestepdestiny]

1. I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair

2. Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.

3. So the next morning, we had to tell the kids we were moving furniture around all night.

4. I'm engaged.

To a real boy who has met me.

Inej Ghafa

[tricktofalling]

1. I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.

2. any guy who tells you he is not like other guys is the leader of the other guys. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

3. How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???

2

[every_blossom_blooming]

this is the most true thing i've ever heard

Neil Perry

[shadows_have_offended]

1. just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show

2. 16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay

3. I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.

Re: Neil Perry

[prettydamngood]

3. >.>

Frank Castle

[onebatch_twobatch]

1. You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..

2. tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.

3. ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't my ex in disguise again?

4. I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.

4

[to_do_and_die]

You punched me in the face, of course I bled on your fucking shirt. Did you think I was gonna bleed on mine?